Monday, September 14, 2009

When should you be done?

Mark and I have been fighting A LOT lately. . . like every day type shit. It doesn't matter what it's over, mostly trivial DUMB BULL SHIT but it's a constant. We almost have to pretend to get a long on the days we manage not to get into fights or rarely talk at all. I know that I have a very argumentative attitude and I can start a lot of shit but I refuse to accept full blame for every fight. He would probably say I'm just being sensitive or tell me to retract my claws like usual.

I have bad experiences with relationships that fight all the time. Even though I've already invested my emotions it's so much harder to convince myself to keep doing so in order to maintain a relationship that I'm uncertain for. I've really got nothing in ideas for trying to make things better though. I honestly think that it may be because we spend too much time together. I'm at my end of fighting. I've been sick and tired of it and definitely had more than enough of it. I don't want to let go that's the last thing on my mind but because the resolution of just trying to make sure that it doesn't make it to an argument is not working something else has to happen. Hm. . .anyways. . .I have a hard time seeing at night because of light sensitivity so I'm going to go to bed. Night.

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